Dear Penn State,
It's kinda hard to explain to everyone else. How I feel about living in this town and with it, your shadow. I like to prefer to keep my answers pretty concise and generic about growing up and living here.
"It's a great time, but I've been here a while"
"It's quaint."
"It's happy.",
"No place like it."
"You can have a blast and make memories upon memories"
"It's simple"
"I have never minded living here."
Being young in this town is town has always been easy. Possibly easier than breathing. It is consistently being reloaded with 18 year-olds. And good ones. You are for all intensive purposes a very large and very competitive university that is well respected across the country. I was born into an oasis.
The flux of youth and passion infiltrates everything, starting with the public school system and ending with retired alumni, who come back, sometimes years later to remember a certain period of time when they were immortal.
In the beginning it starts with student teachers, our administrators, our athletics, had some echo of Penn State to it. By the end of first grade I understood that you were the king of this town.
For many football (An extremely large part of the your culture) was a love/hate relationship. I would venture to say that most loved it, but there was always a certain backlash due to so many people in the area gushing over anything the team did. Think of something that was popular that you yourself hated. Usually everyone has something, maybe a rock band or television show. I ended up loving it, and I must confess you had a lot to do with that, even though I became a fan of Michigan rather than yourself for athletic purposes. Sorry about that.
On the educational side, we as an academic class were expected to make it into your halls. Minimum. This is not exactly the easiest thing in the world. Thousands of applications are denied by you, but somehow, being from this town, we were expected to get into the school. Yes we had a reputation somewhat of a great high school, a very competitive high school, but I wonder sometimes if that competition was so intense it burns out stars before they're quite ready to bloom.
To me, and I know I'm not alone on this, it gave me the impression the a Penn State education was somewhat mediocre. If we weren't at the top of our classes and headed to different prestigious universities, or accepted into the Penn State Schreyer's Honors College we were 'doomed' to 'just' a Penn State education. Clearly a warped point of view when held in the grand scheme of things.
Socially you never seemed to impact me in high school. A town that has been known as a party area did not actually make the high school a bunch of alcoholics and stoner's in Junior High. Yes some people did get exposed to drugs, alcohol and sex earlier than others but probably no different than any other high school, and considering that just blocks from the high school itself raging parties held by older brothers and sister's were happening all the time I'm actually somewhat impressed that our class held together so well.
Though this changes when I actually begin attending your classes and living in your rooms.
This is when I actually get the label of towny or local, or whatever term you like. I was raised here, I went to school here as well, and now for the first time those qualities put together to make me a minority.
We are also now looked at for a little guidance by our new contemporaries as we more than likely have a better grasp of the town. We know the town well, (Actually, I didn't and to some degree still don't, thus me continually sucking at directions). We can give background knowledge about frat houses and sororities. How to go about getting good football tickets. We feel as though we owe it to the kids that are new in the area to be their reference and guide.
However, I begin to grow exponentially in this age range in both emotion and maturity. I begin to find myself in relationship to bigger pictures and I eventually forget where I am from. I become lost in the world that is Penn State and not State College. And I do this in no different a manner than that of our other 'non-townie' friends. And possibly forever our youths is cemented at this time.
I think most people, regardless of circumstances would say that the peak of their "youth" occurs in this 18-22 year age range. Not necessarily the best parts of their life mind you, but of that feeling of innocence and wonder peaking and eventually slowly coming into larger conclusions about how the world works at large. We were young and invincible and it wasn't going to end. Just like everyone else.
And then....
It doesn't end
While others for one reason or another must leave this town, be it a job, a girlfriend or boyfriend, parents, or affordability...
I do not.
I could stay here forever and stay in touch with my young side forever. Stay in the mindset of a 22 year old and be happy. I could stay by your side and keep my mind in a state of youth and curiosity. I could stay invincible.
But I would most likely regret it.
Because while I have learned an unfathomable amount of knowledge in your shadow, Dear Old State, there is infinitely more beyond it.
And maybe I'll come back. I'm not burning the bridge. I just feel like crossing.
No comments:
Post a Comment